Babs is done with Commssioner Gordon's $h1t:

Gee comic from 1967, WILL WE SEE HER AGIAN?! The suspense is killin' me.

"Too bad you couldn't be a little more like her, Babs!"

"Yeah? Well too bad you couldn't be a little more like a Policeman!"

Commissioner Gordon: Fighting injustice with pizza since 1939

And now; A nice little moment from Batman and Two-Face #27:

"You had to fight with only rocks in your Navy Seal days? That's cute."

I don't know what kinda pizza warfare techniques they teach in the Marines, but keep on teaching it.

See you whenever I feel like posting next!

In which Gordon dies of cancer just to get one up on Batman

From Injustice Year 2 issue 20:

So those were some crummy last words. And apparently in the injustice universe cancer makes you disappear? Or is he just laying on the floor?

See ya' later I guess!

[NSFW] The Joker's Comedy Errors

If you've been keeping up with "Batman: Endgame", you have probably seen that Joker is not a funny clown. And he certainly has no room for mistakes. This wasn't so in the 40's.

In example, he made plenty of mistakes in Batman issue Sixty-Si-

Oh no. No no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no. No no no.

No.

Not this issue. Not now. I'm not ready ye-

In other words, we're looking at the infamous Batman #66 by Bill Finger and Bob Kane.

"Use the force, Robin"

Seem familiar? On the tip of your tongue?  Hint: You probably put this on your list of "Batman Issues To Never Read".

That's right, It's this:

JOKER'S BONER.

This is the part where you:

By the end of this issue, you might find yourself slightly more liking to Superman

Lets begin:

"A special Boner just for Batman."

"You've probably committed some boners in your life"

...No comment

Anyways i'd like to introduce a new Thingy-ma-jig called The Boner Counter. It works like this; every time the word boner is thought, spoken, written, seen, etc, we add a Boner to the counter. So far we're at:

Boner Counter: 5 Boners

Also I don't really think the Discover of America would count as a mess-up, by the way.

Onward:

Alright, seems like the average Gotham Robbery so far.

Wait. Into the Elevator?

...Well no S***.

I mean I could totally see them actually using the elevator to escape creating a plot hole, so bravo to Bill Finger remembering the elevator wouldn't work, but was this really necessary?

So they race to the stairwell, but meet an obstacle dressed like a Bat:

And excuse me, but did the lights come back on? Odd.

"We can still take the elevato-... Never mind"

"He threw a match into some chemicals for film processing! I don't know why they were here in the first place being this is an electric company, but i'll roll with it."

Maybe you should have taken him down when you disarmed him? Just an Idea. Anyways this page mentions boner twice, so now we're at:

Boner Count: 7

And here it is folks; the panel that made this issue infamous:

When was the last time a newspaper used "Chortle"?

And I absolutely love the henchmen's reactions:

"Did he jus' say-"

"Yeah he did! I don't think he knows what a bo-"

"Quiet you idiots! Oh man this is gonna be a long caper."

So anyways, Joker then has his realization:

Yeeeeeah. We're only to the 2nd panel of the 4th page and Boner has been mentioned how many times?

Boner Counter: 12 Boners

12 times. 12 Boners. 12. If this were a drinking game, you'd be dead. And also, Joker just gave a perfect explanation of this entire issue:

That's all this issue is.

So anyways, wow do I say that a lot, they begin the Boner crimes:

The only thing I have to say is;

1. sorry for the bad cropping

and

2.

...

You know, the blog industry isn't always easy.

Next:

...That works. Whatever Floats Yer' Boat (Buh Dum Tss). So four pages down, where's that Boner counter at?

Boner Count: 15 Boners

This is getting painful. Oh, and I need a little clarification:

Will the "Fun Will Begin", or is it the "Fun Will Be Gin"? Speaking of Gin, don't use that for the drinking game. Just don't play a drinking game with this issue. Many a' good men have lost their lives that way.

So they steal the diamonds, and the newspapers react accordingly:

"Stung by his Boner..."

By Encouraging him. This is all their fault in the first place! Way to take responsibility there, Gotham Gazette.

Once again, Joker's henchmen are priceless:

"Wait, he's not done with this yet?"

"Oh no. Tell my wife and kids I love them. I'm not gonna make it."

As for how he uses this to pull a job? Beats the pants off me. He does, I just don't know how or why.

No, I don't think he didn't account for the Joker and his Boner crimes. Because how would he?

Alright yes, he did make the tower lean. But why? Other than just to be a jerk, how could he profit off this? And did they come back a week later? Or did they stay the whole week in a castle like "So this is nice"? Why not rob it, then set it up to lean so others discover it happened weeks ago?

And was it really that hard to scale? There's no guards, no security, no nothing. There's not even a fence. And he had no difficulty scaling it when it was leaning, so hard could it be when it's upright? Moderate-Difficulty?

Oh, where's that Boner Counter at? Here it is:

Boner Count: 19 Boners

This is staring to rival Joker's Body Count over at the DC wiki. So later as the papers continue to encourage the Boner crimes, Batman and Robin finally appear again in this issue. I was starting to worry.

"Batman will make the Boner of the year..."

...

Um... Use the Force Robin?

Nevermind.

Yes. Batman has a book about boners under his "reference books".

And now:

Boner Count: 25 Boners

25 Boners. and more to come with even more Boner crimes:

I don't even know what to do with these.

Boner Count: 27 Boners

Next:

"I'm worried about the boner he's readying for you!"

So it appears Batman's formulated a plan to beat Joker. But keep in mind it's the golden age. So it's one of those types of plans. The type formed out of his sheer genius.

Yeah Bruce, how?

"Because I'm psychopathic clown, Jeff."

AAAAAAActually you would stick out like a white thumb, Mr. Joker. Being that you're the palest dude in Gotham and the Roman Empire. Also, how wouldn't they recognize you? You're an infamous wanted criminal! If it were Batman and Robin in those disguises, they'd recognize them too. Because you're both well known.

And didn't at least one person say "There's WAY too many extras here. Who are you guys"?

Boner Count: 31 Boners

I want you to actually think about that. No, don't just think okay we're at 31. Lets move on now", actually think about it. Why was there a need to say Boner 31 times in a total of 8 pages. I'm just asking you think about how ridiculous that is. not to picture 31 Bone-

Moving on:

"What a Boner those movie will make when they pull this horse outa here tomorrow morning!"

Apparently in Gotham, movie people have a fetish for pulling Giant Wooden Horses full of Gangsters out of Warehouses.

The narrator totally missed the oppurtunity to say "Late that night... In the Darkened WareHorse...".

But anyways Batman halts production by stopping the Horse, and making the guards check it. Literally "Have you checked inside that horse?".

So this is what comes up when you google "Check your Horses":

Apparently Horses get tooth decay.

"Well whadawe here, Batman?"

Then the showdown commences:

And i'll be d*mned if that isn't the most terrifying horse in a batman comic:

"Foolish mortals. Your quarrels mean nothing to an immortal."

"I have stood since the romans. I will continue to stand"

"Your meaningless souls are mine"

Yeeeeah no thank you. I'm gonna need a picture of Batman punching a horse:

Thank you Scott Snyder. Now back to the issue:

So Robin slips on some random Greece Grease (See what they did there?) and the Joker gets away.

Aside from the intended pun, i'm starting to see a pattern. Remember way back at the beginning of the issue, Joker escaped by lighting some Film on fire that shouldn't of been there? Well now there's a random Grease spot on top of the horse that shouldn't be there, also allowing Joker to escape.

Too big of a coincidence for me. And whenever there's a piece that doesn't fit it stories, I know my #1 suspect:

Gordon has a dark side

Anyways, we haven't checked the Boner count in a while, so:

Boner Count: 32 Boners

Not too much farther along, but hey. That's quite a lot of bone-

Never mind.

Where was I? Oh yeah. So Robin slips on some Greece:

Was that a threat? No not from Joker, from Gordon:

"It'd be a shame... If you, per say, flew directly into a storm"

"And had an accident"

Gordon has a dark side

Anyheck:

So they have to set it to automatic, which flies them out of the storm:

...Joker just saved Batman's life. From Gordon. Huh. Now THAT is a Boner.

And who hasn't heard of Batman, even in England:

*Retches* "What the h*ll is that?" *retches again*

*Flies past*

"You never heard of Batman? Yerr still hungover matey"

That looks nice, btw:

Anyways, i'm getting tired of reviewing this. It's been like a month long project. So NEXT:

"News O' Globe"?

Just like Batman, I have 

But I do have a Boner counter going Out of Control:

Boner Counter: 35 Boners

So finally; this story ties up nice an-

"We needed the time and a series of readings to plot the direction of your beam!". So, uh, why didn't you still fly to California? You'd still be able to track them AND testify without being an international Joke. Because Batman said so. That's why.

-happily?

What? What about the wrong way Corrigan thing? Won't Batman still be a joke or whatever? I guess it doesn't matter, seeing as it was never mentioned again.

And what was that officer?

Why? Does he have something against criminals throwing parties in the name of Boners?

"You scum are the worst. I wish I could blow your brains out right here and now. Throwing a party, like you're above the law? You make me sick."

"I'm going to make sure you Rot in your own partying filth."

"I hate you more than you'll ever know."

One last thing:

Boner Count: 38 Boners

This issue has Boner mentioned around 40 times. Think what you could do with 38 Bone- {SLAP!} Okay, sorry. Me and my inappropriate jokes.

So that's that. Batman #66. Lets never talk about this again.

Well, my ride's here:

Man did this post take forever to write. Appreciate it you little Boners. See you whenever I feel like posting next!