Bat-Hound Week; Day 6: The Return of Ace Wayne

It has come to my attention that yesterday we didn't even get through 2 pages. Almost, but not quite 2 pages. Then again, yesterday was a sad day. The day evil won. We didn't quite leave on the best of terms, but we still have to make it though the rest of Batman #131 by Bill Finger and Sheldon Moldoff.

Where'd we leave off? Oh yeah. Calamity. The Death Of Bat-Hound.

Or so you thought!

Now hold on. Before you quit this blog forever. To be fair I did hint that our four footed companion didn't die. Given what the titles of today and yesterday's blog were called, it was pretty obvious I was making reference to Batman RIP and The Return Of Bruce Wayne. So where do we go from here? Just like in ROBW, Ace goes back in time and loses his memory!

Like I said yesterday: If you're hoping for an epic betrayal resulting in a fight between our favorite pooch and the caped crusader, prepare to be let down. You would think a snarling Bat-Hound would attack people. Calm Bat-Hound attacks people. So what does Snarling Bat-Hound do?

...Run away? So after meeting Santa Claus on summer vacation, Ace chillaxes with him for a few days. Until he gets taken hostage, that is. But before we continue, did'nt I say something like - I don't know - "Bat-Hound always gets the best Art"? Yes indeedy. Montage time:

"I miss my superpowers."

I mean, just yesterday we (you guys) thought Ace was dead. Never to bite a crooks arm or race to the Bat-Signal again. And yet here he is, living out his dog days and cherishing life. This is the type of stuff in comics I like. Bat-Hound needed a vacation anyways, being shot and all.

So Santa gets attacked, and Bat-Hound tries to stop them, the Dynamic Duo show up, and all sorts of shenanigans:

Panel 1: That is Ace disarming a crook. 10/10
Panel 2: Are Batman and Robin in front of the moon, or carrying a Giant Egg Yolk? 10/10
Panel 3 & 4: Someone gets punched into a river. 10/10
Panel 5: Ace barking. 10/10
Panel 6: Batman giving a stupid explanation 0/10

And then, my favorite part of this entire issue. Even more than Bat-Hound going fishing. Bat-Hound becomes a messiah:

"Elves are lousy company anyways."

I'm sorry, but did Bat-Hound just give Santa an Epiphany? You're Goshdang right. How? Because he's Bat-Hound. And he doesn't stop there:

Ermagerd. Look. At. That. Smile.

Bat-Hound always gets the best art

Best Dog ever.

So after Messiah-Dog Bat-Hound saves a few lives, he walks around Gotham a bit.

But musically in the background, someone whispers in a high pitched voice: "You can tell by the way he uses his trot. He's Batman's Dog. No time, No Bark."

Uuuuuuuuuuh, yeah. Great plan there, Bruce. I'm sure there's no alternative.

So they go along with another dumb Batman plan, and things of course go awry:

Luckily someone finally catches Bat-Hound and gives him back to Batman and Robin like a good civilian.

But before that, time for some forced jokes. (Also Bat-Hound always gets the best art):

Ladies,

Gentlemen,

You've eaten well. 

You've eaten Gotham's wealth. Its spirit. But your feast is nearly over. 

From this moment on, none of you are safe.

So anyways, they get Bat-Hound back and go home, the end:

Just kidding. Turns out to be another plot. But since when does a Batman comic end like that? You should know better.

And then Batman get's one of those genius ideas of his:

I don't know about you, but to me it looks like Batman is really intent on revealing himself. Actually, he's been full of stupid ideas the entire issue! Recap time:

"They need backup in cars! We better run there!"

"Too bad I don't carry tranquilizers or knockout gas!"

"There's Ace, I better take off my mask!"

"There's a trap! I better walk into it!'

And most recently:

"There's some criminals! I better tempt them to take off my Mask!"

Wow. And the whole make up thing? It was by sheer good luck he had it on from the first time he was going to unmask himself.

At least he has ONE brain cell working tonight and noticed that if the masks came off, Bat-Hound would focus on the next threat he saw: The Guns

"These drugs make me feel funny! Am I a cat?"

Well, time for more forced jokes:

"You're under arrest, Bat-Hound. You just crippled that man!"

"He's Young. He'll Walk Again."

"But you'll stay scared,"

"Won't you, Punk?"

So that's that, Batman #131. Tomorrow, we finish Bat-Hound Week on Day 7. Actually on Sunday i'll post an Epilogue, but that's 2 days from now. Hope this post wasn't too long.

Well, my ride's here:

I don't know about you, but a blog a day keeps the energy away. This can be hard work. So me and Ace are going fishing

See you tomorrow for the finale, on Bat-Hound Week; Day 7!

Bat-Hound Week Day 3: Whitey The Thief-Dog!

Welcome to Bat-Hound Week! This is Day 3, in which we look at the Return of Ace The Bat-Hound in Batman #97 by Sheldon Moldoff and Bill Finger.

Who knew Batman and Robin made meth in their spare time? Ace did, and is willing to blackmail them.

But I affectionately nick named this issue:

The Dark Dog Returns

It's the closest I could find to the cover of  DKR #1 with Bat-Hound.

Because i'm going to make annoying and unnecessary DKR references. And because the story is actually called The Return Of Bat-Hound. This stuff writes itself.

Let's begin:

Bat-Hound always gets the best art. I swear. You'll see, it get's even better later.

So Narrator, where are we today? Ah yes, the Gotham Phonogragh Record and Needle CO, during a robbery. Over at Comics Make no Sense Adam was just talking about how sometimes comics date their media. Having a phonograph company in your comic would be a good example of that.

Little does Millen know, it's all actually an act and Whitey is their leader. Would you honestly expect anything else from Gotham?

And thus, we are shown the awesome power of Thief-Dog!

"LAD-DE-DEEE-DEE"

So during this robbery, Millen attempts to foil it on purpose, but this was part of Whitey's plan most likely. Look at him and tell me he's not a villain:

Anyways once out heroes arrive, our villains have already gone! But they make a startling discovery: Paw Prints!

So guessing deducing that the crooks used a dog (when in actuality the dog used some crooks), Batman makes a tough call:

That Ace must come out of retirement!

And thus...

The Dark Dog Returns

"You know it in your soul, for I am your soul... You cannot escape me"

"You cannot stop me, not with wine or vows or the weight of age — you cannot stop me, but still you try. Still you run. You try to drown me out... But your voice is weak."

"The time has come."

I'm sorry, I can't help myself. So anyways Ace joins the search for the Mutant Leader Dog-Thief.

Following a lead they uncover that the mastermind Criminal Canine is none other than Whitey, the prize dog of all competitions. Suddenly our heroes are called to headquarters, where they learn the true danger of Thief-Dog's antics

The possibility of a Dog Crime Racket, which would destroy Gotham!

Batman shares what he has with Gordon, and they soon learn the whereabouts of Thief-Dog. Next they give Bat-Hound a little upgrade, and sett him lose to find Whitey!

Upon discovering Thief-Dog's hideout, Bat-Hound lets them know that he found it. Next he peers through window to learn the crooks plans, but Whitey is aware of his presence!

And what did I say?

Bat-Hound always gets the best art.

So Bat-Hound purposely makes his presence known, and then flees into the night with info of the hideout's location. Nay, he is the night.

Just look at his Smugness:

"lol missed me"

So by the time our heroes arrive, Thief-Dog and the gang have already abandoned the bas and are on the way to the Diamond Mint. Batman, Robin and Bat-Hound all pile into the Batmobile and race towards the mint...

And actually beat them there. Everything always goes better with Ace on the Case. They decide to take the criminals by surprise when they do arrive, so they have the upper-hand.

So after about 10 minutes or o, the thieves arrive as well and set Thief-Dog to business.

Totally missed an opportunity to do an environmental takedown like in Arkham City.

And thus, they hear out Millen, who explains everything from  his point of view, whilst Whitey acts innocent. Than Batman concocts a plan to prove whether or not the story is true:

Which ties up our issue.

One more DKR reference:

"We could have changed the world…now…look at us…I've become a hound…and…you…you're a joke."

"I want you to remember, Whitey…in all the years to come…in your most private moments…I want you to remember…my paw…at your throat…I want…you to remember…"

"The one mutt who beat you."

So that's that. Batman #97. Join me tomorrow for Bat-Hound Week; Day 4: Bat-Hound and Bat-Mite!

Now time for an Awesome-Ace montage:

Well, my ride's here:

See you tomorrow on Bat-Hound Week; Day 4!