Joker joker joker joker joker joker joker joker joker

First there was

And now there is

+

Honestly, I still don't know what to think about letos joker, but I guess we'll see (in a year)

Batman 45: Ovens and art galas

Welcome to batman archives, where some crazy loner reviews comics all alone every now and then. Let's look at batman 45;

*witty joke*

So if you just got done reading this like I did, you probably have some of the following questions like I do;

What does a particle collider have to do with anything?

Why is mr bloom sporting a blimp?

Who is mr bloom?

Well, it turns out I don't have the answers either. The only answer I really have is the identity of mr bloom. Not that that's important anyway, so let's talk about Bat-hound again for the billio-

*Audible grumble from audience*

Okay FINE, I'll talk about who mr bloom is instead. First, I'll have you look at two pictures;

And

Starting to see something? I think that's all I need to say for now. But I do encourage you to go read some zero year. Just sayin.

So, what else is there to taco bout? Oh yeah, how about batman HITTING SOMEONE WITH A SHARK?!

Fish slap

You wannaknow how to tell if an issue was good? By how bipolar it is. Particle colliders, fighting sharks, robots, freaky plant people, and a love story all crammed into one issue.

Rating;

8.8/10

Well, my rides here

See you whenever I feel like posting next!

Starting over

So knowing me, you know this won't be as cheesy as the title leads on. But I do want to cover some things

* I am completely starting over 

You that read right. I won't finish my convergence, endgame, or any thing else I was previously reviewing. I know that sounds crummy, but if I want to get this blog running again, I can't be so behind. The most I'll say is that convergence and endgame were both fantastic.

* Starting soonish, I will continue with the currently being published comics and episodes of batman, with the occasional throwback comic.

Yes, I did say episodes. Gotham reviews coming.

What I mean by currently published is exactly as it means. I won't do any catch ups of per say batman 41-44. By the way, I totally called bat-Gordon. My following reviews will cover batman, tec, dk3 (hype), batgirl, we are robin, Gotham, and 2 movies once they are released. Batman v superman & Star Wars (because Star Wars bitch.)

* I like pizza

For the last few weeks, I found a little ceasers in my town and have been eating there. I hadn't even realized we had one! For the longest time I considered dominoes my standard, and it still is really, but cmon. Little ceasers is the fricken bomb. 

So that's all folks. See ya soon. My rides here and all that

Sup

*Casually continues blogging after going going dark for the better part of a year*

Welcome back

Gotham Season 1 Review:

If you came here looking for a long length hearty-essay on the entirety of season 1: You came to the wrong blog. The only thing I have to say is

THIS SHOW IS FUCKING AWESOME.

(More Convergence reviews coming soon!)

Batman VS Superman Trailer

So, isn't this movie causing quite the ruckus? For those who haven't seen it; here ya go:

GODDAM I AM EXCITED FOR THIS MOVIE

That being said, it still doesn't come out for about a year, which will seem like forever.

Convergence: The Question #1

You know what I've noticed? There's a LOT of Convergence issues to review. So on with The Question:

My only gripe with the cover is for it being set in Gotham, there sure is a lack of Gargoyles and Water Towers. 8/10 cover

So the issue starts off with (New Earth) Two-Face stealing some of the last available medicine in G-Town, but some of the others want it too

But obviously Two-Face isn't a noob at this sort of thing

10/10 scene

So he kicks their asses. He then takes the medicine to Renee Montoya, who takes it to the hospitals

After Renee delivers it, she heads home to chit chat with Huntress (New Earth Helena Bertinelli), throws on her costume and visits Two-Face.

They start talking about why the coin has been landing on heads every time recently and get into a small scuffle, when Telos announces the tournament:

Then Two Paste says that he's gonna go find an alternate version of himself and kill him. The he pistol whips Question

She wakes up a bit later, and teams up with...

...Huntress & Batwoman.
_________________________________

Thoughts: The Story / Writing / Dialogue is all good, pretty good stuff. Only complaint I have is Harvey is suicidal, that was more of Prime Earth Two-Face's thing.

I am hoping we see some Harvey Bullock / Renee Montoya scenes though, that is one of the loosest of loose ends on New Earth. How exactly did Harvey react to her being The Question? They NEED to tie that up.

Art quality: Some of the best stuff so far in Convergence

8.5/10

And Now, A Moment With Joker

With all these Convergence and Endgame reviews, I hardly get time to do my favorite thing with this blog: Look at the little stuff.

So here's a nice little panel from Batman Black and White (1996):

B: "Joker." 

J: Yes Batsy?"

B: "Shut up."

Convergence: Batgirl #1

Guess what time it is! Convergence time! I think in this post i'll only review one issue at a time from now on, it can be a bit overwhelming to have to write 3 reviews on one page and then have to go back and edit them all.

Anyheck, onto the issue;

Lol what's Gorilla Grodd even doing? Anyways, pretty decent Cover, 9/10

Plot: So the issue opens up with New Earth versions of Stephanie Brown, Tim Drake, and Cassandra Cain (yay) camping out in the desert of Telos right outside New Earth Gotham. Stephanie goes around the corner to "go" when she's ambushed by what I assume is the Flashpoint version of Catman:

They kinda fight, kinda not, then Steph realizes Cass is in trouble and rushes back

Guess what? FLASHBACK TIME!

...And this is the problem with this issue. Stephanie Brown isn't in the Kindergarten of crimefighting, she's been around since Knightfall. I could go on and on about her feats, but that's not the point. This is pathetic.

And then the story does something really right:

Stephanie Brown IS the type of person to volunteer at a hospital. She's compassionate and caring, but she still kicks ass. What they should have done is instead of her quitting for a while, she could be hospital volunteer by day and vigilante by night. And that's another thing: Stephanie is not a quitter.

/Rant.

Anyways, she gives up the cowl for a few months and lives in an apartment with Cassandra

"Maybe we should stop watching fox"

So then Telos announces the tournament, and we see that our 3 heroes are on the list, including Steph. So they start training

Again, annoying. Stephanie is not just a teenager blah blah blah. The flashback to her golden days is pretty nice, but damn this writer has no idea about Stephanie. I get Cassandra is on par with Batman martial arts wise, but Stephanie can at least be a moderate threat to her.

So then Red Robin (Yum) stops by, and the three of them go to stop a mini riot / march when they get abducted by the metal glob things from Convergence #1

Which takes us back to where the issue started.

Art Quality: No complaints

Thoughts: I'll say it one more time, Stephanie Brown isn't a toddler. She was trained by the Batman goddammit, which is even said in the issue. You might as well replace her with a toddler at this rate.

Plot wise, I have no complaints. I forgot to mention Tim gets drunk on cactus juice, but that probably won't play a large role.

Issue Rating:

7/10

Next; Convergence: The Question #1

Convergence: Batman & Robin, Harley Quinn, Nightwing / Oracle

Just when you thought DC was done rebooting... BOOM, Convergence. And since none of the other bloggers are covering it, except Scipio, it's up to me to review these issues. And Stuff.

First up; Batman & Robin 1:

Cover Rating: 8/10

Location: New Earth

Plot:

     Some of the rogues attempt to take over Poison Ivy's food garden, which has been supplying New Earth Gotham with Food.

Batman (New Earth Bruce) and Robin (New Earth Damian) show up

lol

-, start to beat them up, and then Croc bites Batman, Jason shows up and Pulls A Jason

Batman and Robin go home, Damian get's pissy

Damian sneeks out and tries to fight Red Hood, Batman stops them

The Telos (he's the bad guy, i'll talk about him later) interrupts errythang

Then these guys show up as their opponents:

"Grrrrrr, we're a threat!"

End issue.

Art Quality: My only complaint is the quality of the inker. I can tell the semi-Scratchy quality isn't the pencillers fault. The Colors are nice and vibrant.

Thoughts: Breaking down the issue plot wise it's pretty simple, but that's not to say it's bad. I like the thought of Ivy playing good girl, seems like something she'd do. As for Jason, I'm not exactly sure I thought he'd turn out this way like Prime Earth Jason did. The return of Scarlett is always welcome though.

8/10

_________________________

Harley Quinn:

Cover Rating: 9/10

Location: New Earth

Plot:

     We open with Harley robbing a museum a few months ago, which gets horribly botched.

Right as she's being arrested, New Earth Gotham is Abducted by Braniac.

So then she's arrested and sent to therapy for a few months

10/10

The she visits the cop she beat with a hammer and eats his chocolate candy

Yet another 10/10

She and the cop hook up (I'll talk about that down below), and get an apartment together

Meanwhile, Poison Ivy is getting robbed AGAIN, but this time Catwoman helps her out

Then Telos announces the tournament thing, which includes Harley going up against...

Pffffffft... Give me sec...

Harley goes up against Captain Carrot

Ahem.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHA

...Phew. Do excuse me, I can't help myself.

Heh, so anyways they go to Harley, give her her costume, and anti-anti-psychotics:

Which results in

10/10 strikes again

End issue.

Art Quality: No complaints.

Thoughts: As I mentioned earlier, Harley dates a cop in this issue. New 52 Harley dates other peope than Joker all the time, which I've gotten used to. But New Earth Harley would NEVER do this. She can recuperate and try to live normal, but she will only ever love Joker. He will always be her first and only. The story / plot isn't bad, typical Harley Story.

9/10

_________________________________

Nightwing / Oracle #1:

Cover Rating: 10/10

The issue opens with a version of Hawkman and Hawkgirl (NOT versions from New Earth) destroying some western town called El Inferno (Which I have never heard of). They finish destroying it and head towards New Earth Gotham.

Then we cut to New Earth Dick Grayson. And like Prime Earth Dick Grayson, he has returned to being Nightwing. This somewhat irritates me, which I'll talk about down below. Anyways, he's running around stopping crimes like Mr Freeze's Museum Robbery, while Barbara narrates.

Notice the distinct amount of Museum Robberies in Convergence. Just saying.

I'm pretty sure this part of the issue must take place the night before Batman and Robin #1, because Mr Freeze hasn't been arrested yet, but is after this scene. I assume he broke out later this night or early in the morning and then went with the other rogues to rob Poison Ivy. And then Got arrested again.

Anyways, Nightwing briefly talks to Starfire, and then heads back to Oracle's Clocktower. Where they decide to go out to eat

Where the thing happens

So that was disappointing. I hope they don't die :/

Then Hawkman and Hawkgirl show up and they start fighting

They try to make a deal, but can't come to any agreeable terms, so Hm & Hg leave to let them think it over. And then Nightwing and Barabara start planning on how to fight them

End Issue.

Thoughts: I have way more complaints about this than the other two issues, so I'll put them in a list

1. Dick Grayson is Nightwing again. This all relates back to Batman Incorporated, which was way more prominent on New Earth. On Prime Earth it was just a throw away idea. There's WAY too much to talk about on this subject in a paragraph, but the point is Dick has no reason to be Nightwing again.

2. Babs and Dick aren't getting engaged. Convergence is probably the last time we'll ever hear or see New Earth, whether or not it's destroyed. So in it's last appearance, why wouldn't you tie up loose ends like this? Dick and Babs DESERVE to be together. I suppose it's not too late, if New Earth get's destroyed then I'll be very disappointed with  this development.

3. I have no idea what version of Hawkman and Hawkgirl that is. Or any idea about what the El Inferno place is. As far as I've googled, El Inferno is a character, not a place. Whatever I guess.

4. Nightwing being unable to take on Hawkman and Hawkgirl. I call absolute Bullshit. The writer clearly is mistaking this Dick for someone else.

Art Quality: No complaints.


6/10
_________________________

So far, so good in my opinion. I hope the Convergence keeps on Converging.